Relations between the Self and Others: Recalled Childhood Invalidation, Self-Compassion, and Interpersonal Relationships

Abstract

Self-compassion refers to one’s kind, mindful, and self-referential response to the perception of one’s painful experiences and has been linked to a number of positive aspects of psychological well-being (Neff, 2003a, 2003b). Despite this, thus far, there has been very little research examining how this concept relates to various aspects of social relationships. The current study investigates whether levels of reported self-compassion are related to rejection sensitivity and excessive reassurance seeking from others. Furthermore, aspects of recalled parenting are examined to determine whether those who recalled their parents as unsupportive of their negative displays of emotion also demonstrated low self-compassion, a relationship proposed to be mediated by perceived mattering and experiential avoidance. Questionnaires measuring these constructs were administered online to 241 undergraduate students. Parental validation of negative displays of emotion was found to lead to increased self-compassion, a relationship which was mediated by experiential avoidance and perceived mattering. Parental invalidation was not related to self-compassion. In turn, increased mattering and self-compassion led to lower rejection sensitivity, whereas increased experiential avoidances led to excessive reassurance seeking. Further research in this area is needed in order to experimentally assess the cause and effect relationships between parenting, self-compassion, rejection sensitivity, and reassurance seeking.